Petite and fair,she did not have to struggle to get noticed even in her diminutive frame. It was but natural for one to want to look at her again and again . She knew it too…
In awe of her super awesomeness, her over the top confident ways and the fact that luck did seem to favour her again and again,he dithered between friendship and love finally settling for hatred tinged with jealousy.
She enjoyed his company and looked for ways to spend more time with him. Sometimes when he smiled, she tried to read more into it.
Sure as she was of everything else, of this one man, she had no clue. Did he like her, did he more than like her….the thought troubled her with its uncertainty. Ask she will not, after all, why would she care??? But know, she wanted to.
At tea time in the cafeteria when they ran into each other and exchanged pleasantries, she always wanted him to stay a little longer so that she could strike a conversation with him…what did he do after office? what does he like? Small talk …
When it came to her profession however, she knew she would not let anyone pull her down, not even him. If he gets an increment,she too should. If he wins an award, then she has to …rather it was the other way.She had noticed that it was after her name had appeared on the office notice board that he seemed to work longer,stretch himself thin to please the boss.
When he won the award next time, it did not matter to her, she had done that already, moreover, she was pleased at his jealousy.It was a compliment.
But then what changed, I ask.
A lot, she said, hurt writ large on her face. All along I have been fighting within myself, to go closer to him or not, but there he was brewing hatred, spewing venom and spreading rumours about me. What I had achieved in my profession was entirely on my merit and hard work. I never knew he was so jealous of me that he wanted me out of the organisation. I did not know that behind my back others were joining hands with him.How could they??? I did not ever anticipate this!!!
Yes, I am competitive. I am pushy, ambitious but I was in love too, well ! almost.
Why??? Why did others want me out? Why did they dislike me so much that they put their entire life energy to get me out. I don’t understand, she nodded in disbelief. I leaned forward but she didn’t need any consolation. All she wanted was a letting out.