It is important to be selfish, yes, very selfish.
Aren’t we selfish enough? Haven’t we done enough harm with our selfishness?
Well, I am talking about a certain ‘selfishness’ that is not demeaning of others but elevating of self, ‘the self’ within you.
The kind of selfishness that makes you want to fight for what you believe in.
The kind of selfishness that allows you to take a stand, say no to certain things, and essentially lead a life of your choice.
The selfishness that makes you shun those who undermine you, who treat you disrespectfully, who hurt you intentionally, who take you for granted and grant you nothing in return, is a kind of selfishness I advocate openly.
Yes, I am all for a ‘selfishness’ that puts your self above everything else, that allows you to love yourself to the point of no return, a la narcissist, pure,simple, honest kind of selfishness.
Such selfishness springs from self-love and with out self-love there is no loving of others.
So if you don’t want to be one of those who feel that they have sacrificed their ‘valuable life-goals’ for the sake of others, then get yourself some ‘selfishness’, ask yourself, what makes you truly happy?
Cut yourself off from those who only take from you.
Stay away from those who undermine and hurt you at every turn.
If you love yourself first, your love for others will be nobler, richer and definitely more rewarding.
If your cup of love has to overflow, first you have to ensure that it is full, full of love and acceptance of the self,’yourself’.
And it is not easy.
It is more difficult to live a life on one’s on terms than to live it by set standards of the society.
To be able to accept yourself for who you are is more daunting than nimbly following directions which you know don’t make sense to you.
If you are miserly in lavishing love on yourself, you are likely to punish others for excesses of expressions of love.
Why you might even be ticked off because some one chooses to compliment you.
We have so many stories that extol sacrifices, sacrificing food, life style, love, opportunities and so on but we really need to celebrate stories of selfishness.
I believe all stories of success are essentially stories of selfishness, a brute adherence to self-goals no matter what, some times going against society, family, belief systems and everything else.
Ask any sportsman if he/she can retain excellence without selfish devotion to his/her goal?
I grew up thinking of sacrifice as a great virtue. But those who seemed to have sacrificed a lot never looked very happy about themselves. Was it because their sacrifices were not valued or recognized? Or was it because they never really lived the life of their choice?
The wisdom of living taught me that it is important to take care of yourself. It is important to have that all important ‘me-time’, ‘me-goals’,’me-life’.
It is essential to have life-goals tailored to suit you and only you, even if you are branded’selfish’.
Because it is from that position of being selfish that you can even think of being selfless.
Because unless you are happy with yourself, how will you give happiness to others?
So, what are you waiting for, indulge, extol and celebrate the self within you!
Invest in your learning, in your appearance, in your soul-joy and the world will join in your celebration of the self!